A US-based gay Nigerian man, Emmanuel Onwe, has shared a deeply personal story about surviving a traumatic Kito experience that once left him in a state of helplessness and despair.

Kito is a term used within Nigeria’s LGBTQ+ community to describe a dangerous setup in which homophobic individuals pretend to be gay online or on dating apps, luring unsuspecting victims. The victims are often blackmailed, extorted, outed, or even physically harmed.

Onwe recounted his ordeal on Thursday, September 4, after a follower publicly thanked him for a cash gift. He revealed that in 2019, he was “kitoed,” losing everything he had at the time.

“I remember the helplessness, the shame, the weight of starting from zero,” he wrote. “And yet, in that darkness, someone showed me kindness and bought me a new phone. That simple act restored my hope.”

Now living abroad, Onwe says he is determined to pay that kindness forward. He described his journey as a reminder of the power of Ubuntu—the African philosophy of interconnectedness that emphasizes, “I am because you are.”

His story has resonated with many online, shedding light on the dangers LGBTQ+ Nigerians face and the healing impact of compassion and community support.